From The EastWing, A Progressive Love Song, The Name Game

Greeting to all and welcome new friends to the EastWing.

Have you ever been so wrong on the side of so right? Well yours truly mush have been on the wrong side of right this past week. A most damning email pointed out the ills of my way of thinking when it comes to the true progressive wishes of our society. After much thought and consideration of the benefits which we all will receive when the true progressive faction  sweeps across our great land. I join the cause. I’ve seen the light. I’ve been converted. I intend to spread the word far and wide. I will do my part to ensure the progressive way of thinking is preached to all who will listen. I am a soldier in the battle for the hearts and minds of those less enlightened poor souls who have yet to see the way.  Can I get an amen on that?


With the above statement being made, I now agree with our Native American population. I am highly insulted by the racially charged name of the Washington Redskins. One might argue that to name a professional football team after Native Americans would exalt them as fine warriors, but no, oh no. We must be careful not to offend. In the spirit of political correctness and courtesy, we must move forward and right the wrongs inflected upon these Native Americans. We now mustalso turn our attention to the Kansas City Chiefs, the Atlanta Braves and the Cleveland Indians. They too must change their ways and repent for their past sins to the Indians.


And what about those Washington Redskins making fun of skin color. Once again a big corporation is picking on the least of our brothers.  Shame on them. And also shame on those  Cleveland Browns for the very same reason.  They both must change their ways for the benefit  of mankind. All too long these two have been making fun of skin color and no one has spoken up to correct such an appalling  wrong. This cancer must now be removed from our society.
The Carolina Panthers obviously were named to keep the memory of militant Blacks from the 60’s alive. So, as a white boy, I’m now offended by this name. That Carolina Panther name just has to go.

The New York Yankees offend the whole southern part of the country. Do you see a team named for the Confederacy? No! And for good reason, there is no room for any reference to that tragic war that cost this country so many young men’s lives.  Those damn Yankees must choose another name.

I am also offended by the blatant references to the Catholic religion among our sports team names. It’s totally inappropriate to have the New Orleans Saints, the Los Angeles Angels or the San Diego Padres. Even though I’m Catholic, I still know that these names are offensive to the non believers in our society.  We must protect their feelings while they’re here on earth. Course when they go to HELL, well they just went where the Lord thought best.

Then there are the team names that glorify criminals who raped and pillaged the whole world. We are talking about the horrible Oakland Raiders, the Minnesota Vikings, the Tampa Bay Buccaneers and the Pittsburgh Pirates! It’s clear that these teams represent the worst in our society and must be retrained to become productive members of the community in which they live.


We must always be on the lookout for organizations sending the wrong messages to our  village children. Yes, I have bought into the Hillary Clinton theory that “It takes a village to raise a child”. The San Diego Chargers promote irresponsible fighting or even unbridled spending of funds you don’t have. Such a wrong messages to send to our children. These messages cannot be tolerated in a progressive society.

The New York Giants and the San Francisco Giants both promote obesity, a growing childhood epidemic. Such a wrong message to our children. The Cincinnati Reds promote downers/barbiturates. Another wrong  message to our children.  These professional sports teams need to be sanctioned by the First Lady of the United States for doing such damage to the youth of our nation, in particular their dietary needs.  At the very least, she should draw a line across home plate, and when it’s crossed then ask her husband to impose sanctions.
The Milwaukee Brewers. Well that goes without saying. Underage alcohol use has forever been a problem in our society. Too long we have looked the other way and allowed this Milwaukee baseball team to promote alcoholism. This must stop. I’m offended beyond words at this blatant effort to push alcohol to our youth.

So, there you go. WE PROGRESSIVES cannot stand by and watch as sports teams, from sand lot to professional, continue to lay waste to our society by such offensive names. Something must be done.


In order to make sure everyone gets their fair share, it would be necessary that  all sports teams, from sandlot to professional, and residing east of the Mississippi River, need to select a name from the vegetable group. All sports  teams residing west of the Mississippi River, from sandlot to professional, they will select a name from the fruit and nut group.  This name selection process can help meet the President’s goal of having a level playing field for all. And besides, it’s the right thing to do.


Much thought and consideration has gone into proposing  the western states choose names from the fruit & nut group. After all, we do know there’s lots of fruits and nuts out there in California.  Does the name “Nancy Pelosi” sound like a nut?


Stay safe in Afghanistan.


From The EastWing, A Progressive  Love Song, The Name Game


I Wish you well,